It never gets any easier.
Thursday, April 1, 2010 at 12:26AM April 1st has always been a difficult day for me. While everybody else is enjoying their April fools jokes and pranks with each other, I am sadly reminded of my mom's birthday. Each year on this day, I reminisce about the great times I had with her. In such a short period of time, she was able to instill all the key values I would ever need in life. She was and will always be my main moral compass. When I was younger, she would definitely keep me in check and did not let me get away with anything. I still live by her rules today and can hear her in my ear whenever I am about to head in the wrong direction. I am so thankful that I was able to spend the little time I had with her. I will never forget her and her influence on me. She will always be a part of me.
Reader Comments (100)
I can only imagine how hard that must be for you each year! its also my 29th birthday today and i always think about you guys & your beautiful mother on this day to with each year that pass's.i plan on spending today with my daughter & family theres no where else i would rather be! your in my thoughts taj much luv cheri x
i also wanted to add how proud im sure she is of you all! xxx
I imagine your pain. I'm sure that your mother is proud of you.
A french who never forget you.
I imagine your pain, I lost my father 7 years ago... every year it's the same pain...
I learned to live without him. But it's not every day easy.
I missed him when I get married, and when my little boy was born. He will never meet his grandfather.
But my son is my live, and without him I think I couldn't live.
Take care of yourself. Your mother is proud of you!
Céline (from Belgium)
It's true she has instilled good values into you and your bros that's why you 3 are good, simple and really nice.
Unfortunately I know how it feels to lose a mom but as you I try to keep in mind what she instilled into me and I also try to keep the positive things that happened to us when my twin and I were younger. I'm sure that she is proud of her 3 sons ;) and just because you're good guys I'm sure she's proud of herself to have brought such nice boys up. Living by her rules is the best thing you can do. :)
Spend this day with loved ones.
XO
Nad
I don't think you could of said that any better...and i know it will never get any easier . but here is me and my children sending you some love and hugs your way....may your mother rest in peace...and for what it is worth you have turned out to me an exceptional man...i know she would/is proud of you...don't ever forget what she has taught you and pass it on that way she will all ways live :D we love you
Hi Taj
I know today will be a day of mixed feelings for you and your brothers, I hope you all are able to celebrate the women that she was and not dwel on the pain caused by anothers. I know that its no comfort but know that you will be n my thoughts and prayers today (as you and your family are always) - I lit a candle for her today and one for you and your brothers and father !! oxoxoxoxo
Dear Taj,
Know, that I'm thinking of you (and your brothers) today. Beautiful words! I truly believe she is watching over you.
You're in my thoughts and prayers.
Lot's of love,
Yvonne
You and your family are in my prayers.
Taj I'm so sorry you feel this way i feel the same way you do because my dad
died in a car crash on the way to the hospital when i was born.It's good that you actually knew your mom and i never get a chance to say the word "dad". Im sure your mom is so proud of where you and your brothers are! : ) I hope you feel much better.
Much love,
Savannah :D
Taj,
Doesn't the world have a sense of irony sometimes...spring is a time of new beginings but when it has been marred in the past by a tragedy it is never quite the same. I am not going to pretend to understand exactly what you are feeling as grief is different for everyone. That being said, I lost my mother four years ago. Her birthday was in March. She would have turned 48 this year. It never does get any easier but I have come to find that the wildflowers on the ground, the baby animals on the ranch, the why the stars shine after a spring rain, and just the smell of the earth coming alive provide comfort to me. It is if the world is telling us that life does come anew. I hope you do find reassurance in something of meaning to you. Just remember that perhaps they are not stars in the sky but rather openings in heaven where our loved ones shine down to let us know they are happy...its an old legend but I think its true.
Peace and hugs,
Amber
hi taj i can understand 1 april i very difficuld day for you and your brothers becuse is your mom birtday and she is not around anymore but she watch over you and your brothers much love to you and brothers
I am really sorry for you and your brothers, I have a big thought for you in this sad day
Kisses
PS: excuse me for my English if is not very correct, I am french :)
Bless you Taj xx
This made tears come to my eyes. I'm thinking of you, your brothers, your father and the rest of your family today.
Thank you for joining us on the web chat, that was very kind of you. Do you realise the commotion you caused just by letting people see you LoL. There is a lot of love here for you, please remember that.
ps. You are beautiful when you smile
x x x
Hello,
I know this is a very sad day for you and how difficult it may be. Rest assured that after all this is done you will see her again. For know just look in the mirror and you will see your mom; you are the splitting male image of her. Stay Strong Taj and know we are here for you and you will always have our support. You and the entire Jackson Family are very much Loved. We Love You, Sincerly.
God Bless.
Sounds like you had a great Mom. I know she was the inspiration for you and your brothers and I hope you will continue to make music together. You boys do seem to be well raised, a credit to your Mom. I's never heard of 3T until after MJs death and in searching uTube things on him stumbled on you 3, and was immediately a fan. I've bought the 2 CDs you've made and am anxiously nawaiting more from 3T.
Hello Taj,
My thoughts are with you always but especially on this difficult day. You are all very special people and will always make her proud.
Love to you always
Candida 'Golden Cherry' England xxx
strange how so strong feelings can be felt the same way in so different countries, cultures and languages around the world.. you're in USA, i'm in France but yours words sound so strongly for me, as i feel so lonely without my dad... a lot of people tells me it would be better in few years.....i don't think so... not only someone is missing in my life, but it's really one part of mine, one part of my own personnality which is missing.....
it's difficult to explain theses kinds of feelings even when we are supposed to be adults!!!! but it really helps reading about your lines... few people can understand how it hurts.....
Karine
Hey Taj,
As long as you remember the good times and all she taught you, she will always be a part of you. I know you will keep strong for your family. You are truly a remakable family and I love you all.
With all my love and support,
Laurie
I'm sorry, I didn't know it was your mothers birthday. It's very sad loosing a parent at a young age.
Hope everything is well.
I have just started visiting your place here, I like it, and good luck with your work :)
Hello,
Is always sad and very difficult to loose a family member a mother, father, brother. In my case it was my brother and the emptyness is something i cannot explain but... is good to read that you have manage all those emotions in a good way and had made it very positive in your life. Those momets will always be there the laughing, hugging, the quality time etcc... take care and god bless.. Ely
Hi! I think of you, it's very hard to lose a family member, I know it, courage.
Sorry for my english, but I'm french^^"
Good luck for the future. Love you guy.
Hi Taj,
I can understand what you go through twice a year(her birthday and the day she died) and it doesn't get any easier. I lost my mother in July of 1996 to Breast Cancer. Even though I was 22 years-old when she died, I feel like I only had a short time with her and feel like someone is missing in my life. What hurts the most is that I was away in college during the time she was sick so I didn't get to spend a lot of time with her while she was ill. That's the way she wanted it, she wanted me to stay in school and finish so that's what I did. I still think of her every day and the time we did have together. like you said when I am headed in the wrong direction, I can still hear her in my ear keeping me in check. That's the sign of a good mother that even though they are no longer around, they are still guiding us in the right direction, doing what they taught us to do and living by their rules
Take care of yourself ,good luck with code z and tell TJ and Taryll hi.
After that there is nothing left to say. May God guide you and your family's foot steps.
May your mom rest in peace Taj !
I think of you ;-)
Lots of kisses from France